As Predicted...

 Not a 2/3 split. A full class of 30 grade 2 students. There are about 10 with huge behaviours and all of them are unregulated. They cannot. sit. still!!! So frustrating to try to teach. I spend most of my day walking on eggshells to not set off kids, and the other part of my day waiting,  reminding and encouraging students over and over to please sit still! Stop talking! I will wait. So much waiting. 

When we are all settled, inevitably, someone upsets the calm with noises, poking the bears, or arguing. 

It is hard to know if students are unable to self regulate due to covid or because they are being parented by electronic devices. Probably a little of both. These kids act entitled. They are selfish and everything is all about them more than I have ever seen before. Every day is exhausting and so many things are not getting done and more and more every day I feel like it doesn't matter. The kids don't know. My admin doesn't care- they are never down in the wing and when they are they come in all together- like teenage girls that can't go anywhere without their buddies. I can't decide if it is because they don't know what they are doing, they don't trust each other or both. Such a strange place to work right now. 

We can't get subs because there is a shortage, but even with that, they don't want to come to Crystal Park because our students are not disciplined. They are rude and disrespectful to teachers and so of course they aren't at all nice for subs. I don't blame them for going to other schools with smaller class sizes and admin that have their stuff together. At least more than our admin do. I would go there, too. But they didn't hire me, lol!!

EAs are also so hard to find. I started the year with Dena, my EA from last year and Dana, a new to the district EA. She is amazing. Both of them are strong EAs. In late November Dena left to adopt beautiful twin girls. They were the addicted grand babies of a family friend. She will have her hands full, but those babies will be so lucky to have such an amazing Mom.

So I was without an EA for almost a month. Surprisingly, we did pretty good on our own due to all of the crazy sicknesses that are going through the community. Most days in November I was down to half of the class. Still a tough group even with only 15. But it was a godsend in a way because it allowed us to manage with only one EA. Since then, they have hired a new EA (no experience) and she was in the classroom one week before coming down with a variety of ailments and has been off ore than she has been at work. She will be a good EA but she is loud. I haven't figured out how to tell her to be quieter. We are modeling though, and hope she catches on. 

I will say that I am doing what I did not want to do. I am doing okay at it. I still do not want to teach this group of kids, but I am. It is un-managable to have so many students. But... I will manage.

Then I will stop teaching full time. I will stop doing what I am pretty good at. 

My parents need me to support them. I need to get my mental and physical health in check and I need to do something else before I hate what I do. The year can't end soon enough. Ugh.